All women are flirts, but some are restrained by shyness, others by sense. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Alright, I guess it all started with a joke. He was in the office whining about something he had to do. Probably a place he had to deliver parts to. Strangely enough I found it annoying, after all it was his job to deliver parts. What did he think he was getting paid to do? My annoyance bubbling over I turned to him and said lightly, "Hey, Chad? Stop complaining." He turned and laughed at me, "That's funny, coming from a woman." I glared at him scathingly, "Obviously you don't know me that well." He looked at me for half a second, as if deciding something, "I know you wear boy's underwear."
I was speechless. Where on earth had that come from? "What?!" He repeated the phrase, slower this time, "I know you wear boys underwear." I choked out a mirthless laugh and sent him a confused look. "What? No, I'm pretty sure I don't." His smile faded slightly and he said in a would-be serious tone. "Yeah. Not like boxers. Like those white ones that boys wear." I glared at him for half a second. "Whitey Tighties?" I supplied.
"Yeah. Those."
How on earth had this conversation gotten here? How did he know what color underwear I was wearing?
I assured him that they were indeed girl underwear, and then moved on as quickly as possible. I was sure I was blushing. I thought that was the end of it, but I soon found out that the conversation had set a precedent. From then on, he'd see me and ask me what color underwear I was wearing. (I made sure he couldn't catch another glimpse. I assume that he had snatched a glance when I was bent over in front of the filing cabinet.)
If I was surprised that he would bring up my underwear in a work setting (much less at all), I was shocked when I found out he was married. He was blatantly flirting with me, and I would even flirt back a little (once I got over "The Underwear Incident"). I was slightly consoled when I found out he was in the middle of a divorce. Perhaps that's horrible to say, but I felt that having a married man flirt with me was horrible, while having an almost-single man flirt with me wasn't so bad.
That reassurance was short-lived, however. For not much later I found out he was still married... and not planning on a divorce. The problem was, I couldn't get over my flirt mentality. I was so glad that things worked out between him and his wife, but he still flirts with me... and I flirt back. I have a huge amount of guilt over this, but that's pretty much where our relationship stands. It's nothing huge, really. It's all quite innocent. No more underwear references. Just more like, "When I leave the country and run to Mexico, I'm taking you with me." Kind of thing... It's the first time I've had to deal with that though. The married guys don't flirt with me, and I've always treated the married men with respect and aloofment (is that a word?). Yet, he's always been married, and always been flirting, and I don't know how to change that dynamic. Note to all: Don't flirt with married men. Duh?
I wouldn't think anything of it. Some people are really flirtatious and their spouse is ok with it and knows how they are and how they act but trust that nothing will come of it. There was this guy in my public speaking class a couple years ago that shocked us all when he said he was married at the end of the semester because he was that kind of a flirty guy but apparently that's just how they roll. I don't know if I have that much trust I can just extend to a very flirty husband but some do :) I wouldn't feel guilty over it :)
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